Forty Days on Being a Four

"How are you feeling?"

Christine Yi Suh says that this has always been a hard question. She writes: "The more accurate question for a Four may be, 'What aren't you feeling?' I can grab my prevailing emotion and tell you how I'm doing from that emotion's point of view (joy, elation, sadness, grief, confusion—you name it!). I live and breathe a kaleidoscope of living, feeling, conflicting emotions."

Many times Fours are labeled "emotionally intense" or "too much," but for a Four this is just how life is. This is why Fours are ideal companions in the midst difficult times: the death of a loved one, the birth of a baby, transitional seasons in career, relational conflict, and so on.

The Enneagram is a profound tool for empathy, so whether or not you are a Four, you will grow from your reading about Four and enhance your relationships across the Enneagram spectrum. Each reading concludes with an opportunity for further engagement such as a journaling prompt, reflection questions, a written prayer, or a spiritual practice.



Christine Yi Suh is a writer, spiritual director, and pastor. She has previously served as a pastor of spiritual formation and as the assistant director of spiritual formation and care at Pepperdine University. Christine received her MA in theology from Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary and is a graduate of the Renovaré Institute for Christian Spiritual Formation. She is a regular contributor to Missio Alliance and the Nine Beats Collective. She and her spouse, David, live with their two children outside of Los Angeles.



Suzanne Stabile is an internationally recognized Enneagram master teacher. She is the author of The Path Between Us and coauthor, with Ian Morgan Cron, of the bestseller The Road Back to You. She is the host of The Enneagram Journey podcast. Along with her husband, Rev. Joseph Stabile, she is cofounder of Life in the Trinity Ministry located in Dallas, Texas.

Welcome to Enneagram Daily Reflections by Suzanne Stabile


On Being a Four


40 Daily Readings

"As I encountered the courageous journey of Christine Yi Suh discovering and living into her own 'uniqueness of being' as a Four on the Enneagram, there was so much that spoke deeply to me. Christine brings a timely concern that this popular tool be explored, not simply for our own personal growth but for the sake of building a more compassionate society. In generously sharing with us glimpses of her own self-discovery, she guides us in how we can create safe spaces for those who have been marginalized and silenced by the dominant culture. Above all, with a beautiful interweaving of personal story, biblical narrative, and social awareness, she encourages each one of us to 'show up' in this broken world as God's beloved, special, and unique image bearers, whatever number we may be on the Enneagram. Christine's passionate writing voice, representing a fresh wave of much-needed new writers, will be a gift for many of us."



"Christine Yi Suh paints an honest picture of just how significantly the intersections of culture, race, and gender can impact how we read ourselves and others in the world. Not only is this book an insight on Enneagram Fours, Christine offers the reader a vulnerable invitation into her own story of revelation and becoming as a Korean American woman leader. An inspiring, layered, and insightful book!"



"In Forty Days on Being a Four, Christine Yi Suh gifts us with more than just keen and valuable insights into what it's like to exist as a specific Enneagram type. She offers us pastoral wisdom wrapped in grace, and room for loving reflection and challenge. Fours and all types alike will love getting to know Christine as an incredible leader and trusted guide for our current times."



"Informative and insightful, Christine Yi Suh invites the reader not only into the complex world of the Enneagram Four but also the lived experience of a Korean American woman. The growing popularity of the Enneagram has lacked the nuances of how culture impacts the Enneagram learner. Christine masterfully adds layers and texture in her writing through history and personal examples of struggle and victory. Christine's graduate studies and work in the area of spiritual formation are an added benefit. Her questions and prompts are full of depth and skillful direction that help the reader pause, process, personalize, and implement the topic of the day. For every Four and every person who is in a relationship with a Four, this book is a gold mine."



"Christine Yi Suh's wonderful Forty Days on Being a Four helps us explore our gloriously tumultuous inner worlds, motivations, and emotions . . . the natural habitat for those of us who engage the world as Enneagram Fours. Reading this book helped me feel seen and a little less weird. But more importantly, in sharing her experience as a Korean American woman, Christine invited me outside my limited viewpoint as a white dude and into a fuller and more beautiful vision of what it means to be a Four . . . and a human. This book is a gift."



"I am not an Enneagram Four, but I was drawn to this book (and indeed the entire series) because as Christine Yi Suh writes, the Enneagram doesn't bring me greater self-awareness but is 'a tool to bring greater understanding, empathy, compassion, and grace to one's self and one's neighbor.' What I didn't anticipate was how disarmingly tender this book of daily reflections would be. When Christine offers profound insights into how Enneagram Fours are shaped by their environments, she also generously invites us into her lived experiences, the intersections of her ethnic identity, her womanhood, her faith and work. Each daily reflection ends with questions and guidance that leads you from her reflections into your own. My relationships and my own soul are already richer for the experience. I'm grateful for this series and Christine Yi Suh's powerful contribution to it!"



"Forty Days on Being a Four by Christine Yi Suh made me feel both exposed and known in ways I most needed. As with all Fours, I tend to think of myself as so unique that no one else could possibly understand. Not only did this book show me I'm understood, it gave me and my fellow Fours a ladder to climb down from the isolating tower that the need to be 'special' traps us in. Inviting and creative practices engaged my feelings, yes, but also my mind and body in ways that were healing and holistic. And Christine's experience as a Korean American woman challenged me to change my comfortable assumptions about my behaviors and attitudes that she proved were less about being a Four and more about being part of the dominant culture. If you're tired of being trapped in the overwhelming reality of your vast emotional life and the need to feel special, as a fellow Four I highly recommend this book to you." weniger anzeigen expand_less